A talking cat named Mr. Snugs. In most games, he’d be my mentor. Here, he follows me around and loudly critiques my running form. “Your pigtails are asymmetrical today, Luna. The Dark Kingdom will devour you.” I can’t hit him. I’ve tried.
It’s moved. It’s now located inside a public restroom stall at the local mall. The door is stuck. Every time I respawn, I have to crawl under the gap while a random shopper asks, “Is someone in there?” I have no dialogue option except, “Just saving the world, ma’am.”
As I sit here, banana-peel-skirted, trapped behind a mall toilet, listening to Keith the Accountant lecture me about tax forms for evil… I realize the truth. Magical Girl Luna-s Misfortunes -v1.09- By nama...
They said being a Magical Girl was about hope. About sparkling wands and the power of friendship.
I’m not a Magical Girl.
First, the good news: They fixed the typo in my transformation cry. It’s now “Starlight… Shower ,” not “Starlight… Shovel.” That was an embarrassing three days.
The worst misfortune isn’t the pain. It’s the patch notes nama releases every Friday. They always end with the same line: “Adjusted Luna’s suffering to be more ‘relatable.’” A talking cat named Mr
Now, the misfortunes.